Being married is certainly not a life step that should be taken lightly. But often times, people do it for all the wrong reasons and it ends up leading to a bitter marriage or even divorce.
These reasons below are the worst reasons to settle down.
1. You Are Afraid To Lose Him/Her: Using fear as a reason to get married is completely wrong. If you are that unsure of your relationship, then being apart is simply a better bet.
2. Friends And Family Pressure: You will always have family members or friends that put pressure on you to to settle down because they think it is time.
You need to realize that these people would not be in the marriage with you and they certainly would not directly feel the consequences of a broken marriage. Only take this step because you think it is time.
But, you should know that once you are in a bad marriage, you would be so much worse off and wished you had waited for the right person as opposed to settling for the wrong person because you think time was running out.
4. You Feel You Owe Him/Her: Did he pay your way through school? Did she hang in there through your strip club days and your cheating ways? Getting married because you feel you owe your partner a debt is also a terrible idea.
Get married because you absolutely and completely want to and you would feel much more satisfied with your choice.
5. For Material Security: This does not just refer to women who settle down with rich men just because they do not want to worry about money.
These days, some men actually choose to go for women from rich homes/background, perhaps due to promises of wealth from the woman’s parents or the feeling that the woman can solve any money-related problems that come up.
Such marriage would not work out because one person will no doubt feel used and might decide to act out or be disrespectful.
6. You Are Bored: You should also not get married simply because you have nothing else going on in your life. Do not just assume that marriage would provide you all the companionship you need simply because you are uncomfortable with your own company.
Focus on your personal growth, find a hobby, start a business, grow your career, and when the time is right, you would meet your true partner.
7. To Get Over An Ex: Did you just hear that your ex has gotten married? Did you just go through a terrible break-up and you think jumping into a lifetime commitment will heal your broken heart?
Well, this is really wrong. When you do eventually get over the ex (and you will) all you would be left with is a partner you do not love and the feeling of total regret.
8. Pregnancy: Just because you are pregnant, or she is pregnant for you is not enough reason to commit to forever.
This might sound like a good solution at first but in the marriage, you would notice your partner is simply a mother/father to the child and not a wife/husband to you since the child is the only foundation of your relationship.
9. You Have Been Dating Forever: So you have been together for years and years and tying the knots seems like the perfect solution. Sometimes, it isn’t.
When it is time to decide marriage, take another look at your relationship and consider how it will change if you make it official and bring children into it.
Be as honest as possible with yourself and your partner. Do not just start planning a wedding because you think that is the next step.
10. All Your Friends Are Doing It: As humans, we cannot help but compare ourselves to our mates as we progress. We worry about making sure we are where we think we are supposed to be because all our friends are already there. But marriage is a completely personal decision.
Just because everyone around you seem to be jumping in does not mean you should just close your eyes, pick someone and jump in too. Take your time and make sure you, and you alone feel you are ready for the step before taking it.
11. Your Families Get Along: You might have started dating someone because he/she is a family friend or because your families get along perfectly, but this is no reason to make vows to be loyal and faithful to him/her forever. Make sure you are doing it because you both feel ready, in love, and connected with each other
12. You Think It Is The Next Step: You just completed your education, or you just got that big promotion at work. You just bought your first home or you just hit a particular age. Whatever your reason, do not get married just because you think it is the next thing to do. Marriage should not be on some to-do list that you have.
A lot of individuals have married without being prepared emotionally, mentally, spiritually, psychologically and materially and as a result, marriage vows are not kept and thereby a collapse of the union.